Think you’ve had a rough week? Think again. Bet you can’t beat this compilation of work horror stories* we’ve compiled from different sources. After all, misery loves company.

You can never win
“Today, my boss at my new job yelled at me for being 15 minutes early to work. Last week he yelled at me for being late for my shift – except I’ve arrived five minutes early. He’s considering this my final warning before I’m fired” – Late, FML

What a joke
“Today, I went into work, thinking it was my last day before I start my new job, as my two-week notice mentioned I can’t work after today. None of them believed that I was actually capable of getting a better job and thought my two-week notice was a joke.” – Work Hard, FML

Bust a move
“At the end of my first day, I sent an email to my staff of 40+ people. I meant to say that my first day was busy and that I was excited to get started on our project. What I actually said was ‘I’ve been so busty today and I am so excited!’ And, yes, I am well endowed. Embarrassing.” – Arabelle, The Stir

First day, last day
“I got hired for a corporate job. I had my first day and it seemed to be going well and then I, and the rest of my department, got called in for a surprise meeting. Turns out we were all getting laid off. Yep. I got laid off on my first day. That has to be a new record, right?” – Anonymous, FML

Infected resume
“I sent a digital resume and cover letter via email to apply for a position as a technical writer. Within a few hours, a message from the director in charge of hiring came via email. Full of anticipation, I opened the email to find a terse message: ‘your resume is infected with a virus and has been quarantined.’ A person cannot recover from an infected resume. I did not pursue the position further.” – Anonymous, JobMob

But that’s my job
“When I was a receptionist, I once got written up for buzzing our VP to let her know about an urgent call she was expecting. I ‘made her lose her train of thought.’”- LogisticalNightmare, Thought Catalog

It wasn’t me
“I deleted all of Elton John’s payment information from the bank’s system. I just went home and never mentioned or admitted it. I suspect some poor corporate type ended up having to phone him and apologise.” – Hilary Wardle, Buzzfeed

We didn’t tell you about it
“Today, I was informed I wouldn’t be getting a raise because I hadn’t followed the updated protocol. I said I was unaware that there was an updated protocol. My supervisor said, ‘That’s because we didn’t tell you about it’.” – notgoodenough, FML

*Content and names might have been edited for clarity.

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